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Sex is not the Goal

Date: Tue, 19 May 2009 22:34:55 -0600 To: AM-GLOBAL From: "Paul Paltrow" Subject: Sex is not the Goal Baba "Kato je d'eke gechi toma're, shon'o ni, tumi a'sa ni..." (P.S. #2207) Purport: Baba, I have so much longing for You. With that feeling I go on calling You. But neither do You listen to my call, nor do You come close. Although they say that You listen to the feeling of the mind. That You listen to all the thought waves which sprout in the mind, because You are sitting right there in the mind. Although they say like that, to me it seems like You are not residing in the mind. You are not there. That's why You do not understand the feeling of longing which I have for You. I do not know whether You do not have capacity to listen to my feeling, or whether You listen to my feeling of the mind but knowingly You do not respond. This is Your divine play. But this divine play of Yours is very painful for me. You are giving me pain by not caring about my longing. It may be possible that my cry reaches to Your ears, but it does not touch Your mind. That's why You do not give any response. Baba, please tell me that except You who is mine? You know nobody is mine, that's why I open my heart to You. Many tales which up till now I did not tell You, those feelings of my heart I will tell You. Baba, I have so much longing and yearning for You. Why are You not listening. Please pay heed to my call and come close...
Namaskar, We are living in a world where same sex marriages are gaining momentum. For those who may not be aware, a same sex marriage means a man marrying another man, or a woman marrying another woman. From the US to India, from Germany to Brazil, there is increasing interest and public acceptance of same sex marriages. It has even become legal in some states, provinces, and countries around the globe. At present, more than a few states in the US have made it legal. This has spurred heightened support in other regions of the world. As Ananda Margiis - as Proutists - we should clearly understand AM's position on this sizzling & controversial issue.
As in many spheres of life, the perspective of our Ananda Marga on the issue of marriage is quite different from what goes on in the general society. In our Marga, marriages are strictly for society building - i.e. creating a nurturing and stable environment for birthing and raising children. That is the defining point of marriage in Ananda Marga. In contrast, most of the relationships in the today's materialistic culture are sexually based. People quickly enter into lustful relationships, fall in love (temporarily), and then may or may not produce children - with or without getting married. In that case, children are mere by-products of sensual escapades. Pregnancy often comes when the parents either do not want or are not in a position to properly raise a child. This type of thing is happening everywhere and is only growing as the degrading ways of materialism spread.
The main point then is that AM marriages are for creating a stable family environment and relations in the general society are for the selfish pleasure, i.e. sex. Given the current climate in the general society, it is no wonder then that homosexuality is gaining ground around the globe. Because when materialism preaches that sensual pleasure is everything, then it does not matter who is doing the sex - whether it be a wealthy older man with a 19 year old girl, two lesbians, two gay guys, or whatever. Since it is all sex based - and the goal is lustful fulfillment - then anything goes. Because it is all founded on the lowly principle of selfish, sensual pleasure. With just a bit more degradation in the society, adults may even embark on sexual relations with sheep, and it will be socially acceptable. Because, after all, if sex is the defining point of a relationship, then it does not matter who or what is involved.
Since the "union" of two men or the "union" of two women are not biologically capable of producing children, then according to the perspective of Ananda Marga, that union or marriage cannot be supported. In that case our aim on this issue is towards education and rectification. We are to teach people that the goal of life is not lustful pleasure but spiritual attainment. The mind's desire is infinite, and that infinite desire cannot be fulfilled by limited carnal pleasures, like sex. Always the mind will want something more. A millionaire wants to become a billionaire, an older man is not satisfied with his aging wife and instead turns toward a new young honey for his sexual satisfaction. Why? Because of looking for supreme fulfillment in the wrong way, in a limited way. Where materialism reigns, such things are the norm. People are even praised and respected for doing this. Such is the height of materialism in our present era. To take it s step further, some even come into fame for making films of themselves having sex with their chosen partner. Thus sex really is placed on some type of holy pedestal. In that environment, it is hardly surprising to witness the rise of viagara, homosexuality, same sex marriages and anything else related with sex. In response our educational goals are two-fold: To introduce people to spiritual ideals so they will not view sex as the main thing in life, and help rectify and counsel those people who practice gay and lesbian relations. After all they should not be shunned or pushed away. Gay and lesbian people should be taught spiritual practices, given a sentient diet, and encouraged to lead a moral life according to yama and niyama. The bottom line then is that in our Ananda Marga, there is no space or place for same sex marriages. That practice cannot be supported, yet the people involved in such a practice should be helped and guided properly.
One sticking point in all of this is that some educated liberals around the globe have equated accepting gay and lesbian relations and same sex marriages as being a sign of one's broad-minded outlook. In response, the middle class elite and the intelligentsia think that, "If I do not support same sex marriages then I will be looked upon as being in the dark ages, just like the Catholic church." However, following dharma is the quality of a broad-minded person, not one who latches on to some far out idea just because it is the opposite from what the dogmatic church preaches. For more information on this point of broad-mindedness and homosexuality, please refer to the following link.
The logic stands clear: AM marriages are for society building purposes only; same sex marriages are based on lustful desires and cannot produce children; therefore same sex marriages cannot be condoned or supported by AM. That is the whole story in a nutshell. Even then some in our Marga are confused. They say, "Baba loves all, including gay and lesbian people, so we should allow gays and lesbians to involve in same sex marriages. They have that right." However there is an inherent flaw in that justification. For instance, by that logic we can also say that, "Baba loves all, including criminals, so we should allow criminals to involve in their criminal activity. They have that right." Here the main point is that, Yes, Baba loves all, but that does not mean He supports their practice or approach to life. Baba loves all, including meat-eaters and drug addicts, but that does not mean we should therefore place a positive spin on eating meat or doing drugs etc. The main point is that we have to differentiate between the person and their chosen activity. Baba loves all because He has infinite love for all of creation, but that does not mean that He therefore supports their way of living. Rather, all the teachings of AM are given to inspire people to adopt a dharmic way of life. Thus the faulty argument that, "Baba loves all so we should support the legal right of gays and lesbians to marry", can never be considered to be ideological or consonant with the teachings of AM. Just as the legalisation of drugs and prostitution has led to the further degradation of society in those areas, same will be the case if same sex marriages are made legal. With no other ideal in same sex marriage than that of sexual lust, degradation is all that remains.
By Baba's grace He has given the teachings of neo-humanism. People should be educated and guided to free their mind from dogmas like same sex marriage and taught how to satiate their mental longing in a sentient and spiritual way. Our way is not to shun anyone but rather to rectify those whose life practices are counter-productive or harmful. Today, society is polarising on all kinds of issues, including same sex marriage. By clearly understand AM's stand we will be able to propagate the gospel of neo-humanism.
Satyameva jayate...
Baba says, "It is satya that ultimately wins. I shall call only that satya, behind which there is a sentiment of benevolence for others. Falsehood or untruth never triumphs. It never can. It may succeed for a time but that success is only prognostic of dire defeat. Satya widens and smooths the most difficult and thorny path of salvation. It is through such a path that a desireless sage attains proximity to that most sublime treasure of satya – the Supreme Spirit." (SS-2) Namaskar, Punya'tman
Here is another article on homosexuality that may be of interest.
************************************************* Far Reaching Effect
Baba says, "In the world today a handful of people who do no physical work, but live by their wits, have appropriated to themselves most of the wealth of umanity, so they are able to buy comparatively expensive foods, and use them to satisfy their taste buds. As result, they, on the one hand, swell their unnecessary fat, while, on the other hand, those people doing hard manual labour are forced to live in poverty and deprived of the ghee, butter and sweets they need to maintain their bodies; they have nothing to compensate properly the energy they expend, and they become weak, emaciated and broken in health. On account of malnutrition and excessive hard labour, they fall victim to tuberculosis." (YT, p. 82-83)


  1. I completely and utterly disagree with you. Its astounding to me that you can literally translate the beautiful beliefs, philosophies and work of Baba to be so close minded and ignorant.

    First of all, homosexuality doesn't exist because of "lust" and it isn't purely based on the notion of physical attraction. It is something mentaly inate as well that leads LGBT people to be attracted to each others minds. THEY ARE HUMAN BEINGS FIRST MOST! and to deny them any right that every other human being has on the basis of your backwards analysis is WRONG!

    Second of all its extremely EGOTISTICAL of you a "Margi" to think that these people are not capable of spritual practice and sentient because they are homosexual. I wouldn't be surprised if that is blocking your path to baba!

    There are LGBT people involved in Ananda Marga that are just as sentient and spiritual as other Margiis regardless of who they choose to love! To think that there sexual orientation prevents them from loving baba, being dharmic and fighting injustice is IGNORANT!

    YOUR ARGUMENT IS FLAWED AND DOGMATIC in thinking. If you think this is what Ananda Marga represents then you are extremely misguided.

    You are bringing the dogma from your past life before being a Margii and it is tainting your ideas.



  2. Baba

    Rspectd Sanjuptaji,

    Namaskar. It seems you misunderstand the topic entirely.

    The practice of homosexuality is not at all consonant with AM teachings. Either due to glandular defect of lust people engage in this faulty practice.

    As the writer has clearly stated, that does not make the person bad; just their approach towards sexuality is not according to the dictates of AM.

    Sex is not an instrument for pleasure - doing so is to degrade oneself. Sex is purely for reproduction / society building.

    When, by definintion, homosexuals are unable to reproduce, then what is the need or point to their having sex. To do so is just to indulge in lustful habit.

    Perhaps you yourself are gay and that is why you are so confused. Anyone able to view the matter in a rational manner would clearly understand that AM ideological does not at all support homosexuality - period.

    Those persons should of course still be loved as human beings, however their practice of homosexuality will certainly have to be rectified.

    Baba is quite, quite clear about such matters.

    What the margii brother has written in his letter is cent-per-cent accurate.

    In His service,
    Dada JP

  3. Dear Dada JP, NAMASKAR.

    I disagree with you and the Margii brother completely.

    First of all I think it is pretty persumpteous to assume I am gay, because I defend gay rights and thier freedom to love a person of the same sex. I am not gay, BUT I am 100% a supporter of the gay movement for civil rights and human rights.


    LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bi-sexual and Transexual) People or HUMAN BEINGS, do not have to rectify any part of thier behavior when physically showing thier love to thier partner.

    They love thier partner foremost.
    They can adopt children if they want children, but physically showing thier love to thier partner is not a condemning or an immoral act. Straight people do it all the time (sometimes without the goal of procreating).

    Your argument is as DOGMATIC as the Catholic, Muslim and Jewish amongst other anti-gay arguments.

    Saying "Sex is not an instrument for pleasure - doing so is to degrade oneself. Sex is purely for reproduction / society building" is wrong because how is just as dogmatic as religions of the world.

    I take into account that sex is not that all human beings should be pre-occupied with, they should pay attention to thier sadana and service as well as yoga. BUT there is nothing wrong with sex, and there is nothing wrong gays.

    Hence, if you know Baba (and as a Dada I presume you do), you know he was ANTI dogma.

    There is a popular story about Baba. When Baba was asked what he thought of homosexulatiy, he responded with "Do what is natural". So, he obviously does not condemn the act of LGBT people making love or showing love to each other.

    By condeming the fact they have sex with each other and as the earlier brother pointed out that they are incapable of spirituality and being sentient implies that you are condeming them...hence you are saying they are bad.

    Bigotry is bigotry.

    You can not use your own personal translation of Baba's teaching to support the condemning of gays or any other human being based on sex race or ethnicity.

    Otherwise as with all organizations and religions, Human beings will be the source of why a perfectly sound and fair philosophy morphes into hate ideology. You should be prepared to take the responsibility of the downfall of AM if you preach or say things like this by ignorantly translating Baba's teachings-period!

    Let me state again, I AM NOT GAY, BUT I SUPPORT GAY RIGHTS (that icludes thier rigth to love and have sex with each other) AND YES, I AM A MARGII.

    May your sadhana bring you enlightenment and closer to Baba.

    Peace, Love, and in his service as well,


  4. BNK

    Dear Sanjupta,

    Namaskar. You are most passionate about this topic, yet misguided.

    You have a preconceived notion in mind which keeps you far from the truth.

    Neither I nor the margii said LGBT are incapable of sadhana or spirituality. The only case being made is that lesbian and gay relations have no place in our Marga - they are unnatural.

    Regarding sex, Baba has said, "The less the better" and "Let there be maximum restraint".

    That means that the mind should be diverted towards higher pursuits like sadhana and sex should be used solely for reproduction. That is the ideal in this present era - period.

    One can make all kinds of justifications about freedom of sex - but that will not make the point dharmic. Just like one can advocate the freedom to eat meat, drink alcohol, or do cocaine. Defending such freedoms goes against our ideology.

    Baba is a Man of principle not loose freedoms.

    Please pardon me, but you seem to be the latter.

    Just because your stance is opposite to the church does not make it correct.

    Remember, AM is against abortion, yet so-called liberals in society are in favor of abortion just like they are in favor of same sex marriage. They think they are open-minded because they are against church policy.

    But that church policy happens to be correct on this issue. Their reasoning is different from the dharma of AM, but their final opinion is in line with our approach.

    You should not be so swayed by so-called cosmopolitan thinking of liberals. Most are atheistic and materialistic. Following them as you are doing now will take you far, far from AM.

    It is good to hear you are a margii - now we just need you to drop your pre-conceived notions so you may better understand ideology.


  5. Dear Dada JP,

    I am passionate and well guided by Baba on this issue for the simple reason that I am standing up for human rights of a people that are perfectly natural and compassionate.

    When you say, "Regarding sex, Baba has said, "The less the better" and "Let there be maximum restraint"" how does that translate to LGBT people being "unnatural"?

    Baba doesn't intend that to idea to demean anyone, especially marginalized people like the LGBT community.

    However, your misguided and dogmatic translation leads you to translate to think that gays shouldn't have civil rights in the case of marriage, and that they are unnatural. This is really bad thinking and you are creating bad ideology that causes problems in society.

    I am not one of "loose freedoms", I am one for HUMAN RIGHTS!!

    THE CHURCH IS NOT RIGHT! Their misguided and VIOLENT history proves that.

    If you were a Christian before becoming a Dada, perhaps you should reflect on why you became a Dada and why you chose Ananda Marga.

    Because, AM teachings are the EXACT OPPOSITE and OPPOSE much of the CONSERVATIVE Christian ideology.

    When you say "You should not be so swayed by so-called cosmopolitan thinking of liberals. Most are atheistic and materialistic. Following them as you are doing now will take you far, far from AM." I think that is pretty ignorant.

    Neo-conservatives or conservatives that are anti-gay rights and anti-choice are also very materialistic and egotistical. In fact to name a few racist warmongers that believe in the same things you do and who are staunch conservative Christians are George W. Bush and Dick Cheney.

    I feel that I am well guided and have been since the day I have met Baba. He has provided me with everything spiritually and given me much happiness.

    Hence, I don't believe I need to change my ideas, and follow your misguided, racist, neo-conservative Christian based ideology.

    Baba has put me on the right track, because of my outspoken stance for human rights and love for all human beings. As peace activist I aim to live up to what Baba expects.

    I hope in time you will come to terms with being a Dada of AM and let go of your prior beliefs that contradict and put at risk everything that AM stands for.

    In his name with peace and love,


  6. Baba

    Dear Sanjupta,


    It is unfortunate that you cannot differentiate between human rights and proper human conduct, between respecting human beings and learning how to rectify and guide them.

    When you are able to cross that hurdle then our dialog will be of value.

    In due course you will see that our aim in Ananda Marga is to bring people up to the path of spirituality - all people - and not be satisfied by allowing them to fall into a life of degradation, in the name of honoring so-called human rights.

    At present, the bulk of humanity in this era of kali yuga is suffering and degrading themselves due to running after crude, if not harmful desires.

    It will be great if you can help us lovingly lift them up from the mire. That is what being a tantrika is all about: Spreading the gospel of neo-humanism and spirituality, and not letting our own minds be goaded by new age, pleasure-oriented, materialistic thinking.

    Dada JP

  7. Dear Dada JP,

    Its clear that you are probably as misguided when it comes to spreading neo-humanism and spiritualism. But, unfortunately as you are a Dada, you seem incapable of seeing the fallacies that you support because you consider yourself different as a Dada.

    I agree, this dailogue between us is invaluable and useless, as you seem to stick to the anti-neo-humanistic values you love so much. :)

    Perhaps in the future we can continue this dialogue when we have both learned how to cross that hurdle of being spiritual and through supporters of neo-humanism.

    Hope you find peace, love and compassion for all human beings and animals.

    In him,


  8. hello & namaskar,

    i have been following this intense discussion as it is a topic near and dear to me.

    my laukik brother is gay and i have deep feeling for him as one of my very close persons in this life.

    since being margii 14 yrs ago, it has been struggle for me about this issue.

    i have talked to many, many people and tried my best to study Baba's books.

    i love my brother and his companion very much - what can i say, i just love them. and i have lot of positive interaction with the gay community in my country and outside.

    but i do not think this is what Baba wants from us. sometimes i feel people became gay because they do not know what else to do. not always - but sometimes.

    i also see the much of the gay community is very promiscuous and often bi-sexual also.

    why people are gay - that is for researchers, doctors and psychologist to find out.

    but i do feel that much emphasis is placed on sex and sexual presentation - it is a kind of identity.

    i feel better to channelise that to God.

    i know two sisters in two different regions who were gay/lesbian but since starting the path of sadhana (2 yrs and 4 yrs ago) they both left that way of life.

    so what is conclusion - there are many feelings in many directions - but i do believe in my heart that same sex marriage is not Baba's ideal.

    i think being gay and homosexual etc is not according to our ideological code of conduct.

    we must have huge empathy, patience and love to bring everyone together.

    this is just what i understand and my experience - please do not mind.



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