Re: Domestic Issue: What Will You Do In This Situation?

Subject: Re: Domestic Issue: What Will You Do In This Situation?
Date: Tue, 8 Jan 2013 12:46:10 +1100
From: Marika and George Baumann
To: AM-GLOBAL

Baba

== RE: DOMESTIC ISSUE: WHAT WILL YOU DO IN THIS SITUATION ==

~ Part 2 ~

(Note: This is the second letter in this series;  as it is very short, the first appears in its entirety below. - Eds)

Namaskar,

Of course what the girls did was wrong from both Ananda Marga and ordinary moral perspective. They cheated when they spiked the drinks, which is a form of lying. This is against Satya. Not only that, but they showed disrespect to the parents of one of them, and went against their wishes.

And not only that, but they secretly administered medication to them, which might have caused them real harm had they drank all of it. Where was their love for all creation, not to speak of their love for the parents of one of them?

So there is no doubt that the girls acted in an unethical way when average girls of that age would have been aware that what they did was wrong. Therefore, assuming that these girls are of average social and emotional intelligence, some form of negative consequence for them should flow from this.

In our family, and families we know, if something like this occurred, some significant privilege would certainly be withdrawn, like an exciting holiday cancelled or no computer access for a year. But much more important  is to talk to one-another. If the girls did this out of unthinking teenage silliness or naughtiness, they should be given a stern lecture about thinking before they act, then forgiven if genuine contrition is shown. If there was malice in it, it is much more difficult. It may even involve therapy or mediation (not to be confused with meditation, though that is always good too!). Ideally, direct communication, involving really listening to each other should come first.

Reporting the incident to the police, and what is more,  apparently pressing charges against them is something which  I, as the often unsatisfactory father  of three daughters and a son have never contemplated  or had to contemplate. Nor has my wife. Nor have any of our friends. On the other hand, they never put drugs in our drinks or any equally immature or malicious acts like that. 

Thinking about this particular situation, I would speculate that there must have been a great distance (lack of real connection and communication) between parents and children. Unfortunately being the grown-ups, parents are usually more responsible for this than their children.

The ten o'clock curfew for internet use seems reasonable, but this should normally be relaxed on some occasions, e.g. weekends and school holidays. Maybe the parents were fearful that while they were not watching, the girls might access inappropriate material on the internet. Whether this was a reasonable fear or not in this case, I don't know.

But the fact that the parents went to the police and had the girls charged is immediately disturbing.  Was this the last straw, were the parents at their wits' end trying to discipline or control these unruly children?  Reporting children to police often happens if parents feel physically threatened by their children, which in this case may be justifiable.

Or did they  decide to take this action because they either couldn't (consciously or unconsciously) or didn't want to approach the children and try to have a deeper relationship with them? Many parents are busy and tired, and because they have no time or energy to develop a really loving relationship with their children, they might see the police as another service, like a school or a doctor.

I believe this is a mistake. Being arrested by the police must be a traumatizing experience for young people. Also, these girls, if charged and convicted, may get a criminal record. This would affect their work and other prospects for the rest of their lives.

So my conclusion is that, unless some of the parties are below average intelligence, or affected by drugs including of course alcohol, or the parents felt for some other reason that the relationship with their children had irretrievably broken down, reporting this matter to the police and pressing charges would not be advisable.

All the best,

George.



From: "Sushiila" s.u.bhakti@lab...edu
To: am-global@earthlink.net
Subject: Domestic Issue: What Will You Do In This Situation?
Date: Sun, 06 Jan 2013 11:21:48

Baba

== DOMESTIC ISSUE: WHAT WILL YOU DO IN THIS SITUATION? ==

Namaskar,
Please read the following short article where parents had their teen-aged daughter arrested: “A daughter and her friend allegedly put sleeping pills in the drinks so they could break a rule and use the Internet past 10 p.m.”

According to Ananda Marga philosophy, what is our perspective on this matter? As an Ananda Margii, what you you think should be done in such a circumstance - should the daughter have been arrested?

Awaiting your reply,
Yours in Him,
Sushiila

Girls accused of spiking parents' milkshakes

A daughter and her friend allegedly put sleeping pills in the drinks so they could break a rule and use the Internet past 10 p.m.

Kate Mather, Los Angeles Times
January 4, 2013

Two teenage girls were arrested in Northern California this week after they used sleeping pill-laced milkshakes to drug one girl's parents because they wouldn't let her use the Internet past 10 p.m., police said.

The incident unfolded in Rocklin — about 20 miles northeast of Sacramento — the night of Dec. 28, when the parents fell asleep about an hour after drinking milkshakes their 16-year-old daughter and her 15-year-old friend brought them from a fast food restaurant, Rocklin Police Lt. Lon Milka said Thursday. The parents woke up in the middle of the night feeling "really groggy" with "hangover symptoms," Milka said, but had not been drinking.

When they woke up again the next morning, they still felt "really odd," Milka said, and "figured that something was wrong."

The couple went to the Rocklin police station and picked up $5 drug kits typically used by parents to test their children for drugs, Milka said. After the tests picked up traces of drugs, the parents contacted authorities and took their daughter to the police station.

Investigators later learned that the girls crushed prescription sleeping pills and put them in the milkshakes so the parents would fall asleep and they could use the Internet past the 10 p.m. curfew.

"Mom and Dad had the Internet cut off nightly at 10 p.m.," Milka said. "The daughter wanted to use it past 10 because I guess they're like most teenagers and the Internet is their life."

The parents didn't end up drinking all of the milkshakes because they were "kind of gritty" and "really funny tasting," Milka said.

The girls, whose names were not released because of their ages, were booked on Dec. 31 in Placer County Juvenile Hall on suspicion of conspiracy and willfully mingling a pharmaceutical into food. Milka said it would be up to prosecutors to decide whether charges would be filed.

Milka said it was unclear what websites the girls accessed while the parents were asleep.

"It's the first I've ever heard of it," he said. "Kids are crazy these days."

http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-0104-parents-drugged-20130104,0,6488064.story

Who Can Follow Dadaji's "Great" Example

From: "Kalyan_Deva" kalyan.1971@sole....
To: am-global@earthlink.net
Date: TUE, 08 JAN 2013 17:22:31 00:00)
Subject: Who Can Follow Dadaji's "Great" Example

Baba

== WHO CAN FOLLOW DADAJI'S "GREAT" EXAMPLE ==

Namaskar,
Many of our revered senior workers are moving on. They are rising in years; and, after all, the body is but a temporary housing for the mind. Our duty then is to remember all with respect and reverence and learn from their example.

HOW TO EVALUATE ONE'S STANDARD

"I had established an ashram at the foot of the Himalayas...in Dehradun District of UP."  One of the senior-most avadhutas wrote this in his own book, describing about the time when he left AMPS to establish his own ashram.

We all know that in the general society, people's quality, qualifications and attributions are measured on the grounds of various superficial variables.

But according to Baba's Neohumanistic philosophy, character, dealing, behavior, conduct are one's true qualifications. Baba says such things everywhere in His countless discourses. Here below is one significant example from our holy Ananda Vanii.

Baba says, "Your ideal is represented by your conduct. Your learning, your social or economic status have nothing to do with your ideal." (Ananda Vanii #13)

In the above Ananda Vanii, Baba's message is quite clear and without ambiguity: We Ananda Margiis are to evaluate others - and oneself - on the point of one's character and conduct - not on points of money, power, avadhuta dress, purodhaship, kapalik sadhana, vishesha yoga, age, seniority, and Central Committee, Acarya board and Purodha board, or even post of Purodha Pramukha.

According to Baba's above teaching, we should evaluate one's calibre by their conduct alone. Other relative factors like money, post, and power are so-called qualifications and essentially valueless.

To evaluate the quality and qualifications of this senior avadhuta, the late respected Dada Samanvayanandji, we should look to his conduct. Specifically, how far did Dada Samanvayanandji's conduct go in accordance with Baba's teaching.

GURU-DISCIPLE RELATION

In tantra, the Guru-disciple relation is most significant. That is why Baba has given various conduct rules in Caryacarya about serving Guru.

Baba says, "The best service to Márga Guru is to work according to His wishes." (Caryacarya - 2, Society, Pt #20d)

In addition, as Ananda Margiis we always do Guru Puja, minimum two times a day, every day. The last stanza begins with "Guru Brahma...",  and the whole idea is that Guru is everything. Any true disciple of Shrii Shrii Anandamurtiji must have this basic characteristic: To be ever-ready to serve Him.

On the opposite end of the spectrum is betrayal. One must not be a traitor to Guru; that goes against the fundamental characteristic of what it means to be a disciple. If one betrays Guru, nothing is left.

Here in India and abroad, most senior margiis are fully aware about the history of Dada Samanvayanandji. But some new or junior margiis and workers do not know of him. For everyone's knowledge and understanding - as well as for our own learning - here is Dadaji's story.

DADAJI'S STORY:

THE START OF HIS DOWNFALL

When Baba was arrested under false charges and incarcerated, Dadaji did not stand by Guru. Instead, he lobbied against Baba, got frustrated, and ultimately went out on his own. And once he left, he was gone, i.e. away from Ananda Marga, for more than a decade. Here is the history.

In December 1971, the day before Baba was to hold DMC, He was arrested. In turn, Dada Samanvayanandji - then known as Ac Shivananda Avt - was appointed as Guru's representative for that 1971 Dec DMS held in Varanasi. After that occasion, Dadaji developed a big ego, and he proudly thought that his next posting would be overseas.

So it was that in early in 1972, Baba was running the organization from His jail cell. All orders were coming from Him and being carried out in the organization. In this way, Dada Shivananda (i.e. Samanvayanandji) came to know he was given a posting in India. In disgust, Dadaji opted to never go to his assigned posting. Instead he traveled around Nepal, all the while presenting himself as a guru. Then he was given another posting and again he did not show up.

Later on in the year 1972 Baba gave the order that Shivananda (i.e. Dada Samanvayananda) was transferred to Udaipur (Rajasthan) as DS where he will oversee the school. Hearing this Dada Samanvayananda / Shivananda again became very upset and frustrated; he did not want this low post. Dadaji had grand visions: He wanted to go overseas and was looking to do some work in Rishikesh etc. When the posting order came as DS Udaipur, then he felt this was too much. Other workers who were friends with Dadaji tried in Jaipur to convince him to attend to his post. Ultimately, Dada Samanvayanandji went there with some of his own newly made disciples. Upon seeing the school he was to run, Dadaji proclaimed, "You do not know my potentiality."

Dadaji remained at that posting in Udaipur for all of one day. He then went off on his own. Indeed, in that dark hour, Dada Samanvayanandji a.k.a. Dada Shivananda left Baba and the AMPS organisation, and in a challenging display created his own separate organization, "Prema Marga". That time, Dadaji established his own office in the foothills of the Himalayas at Dehradun.

Let us not forget that in those days, Baba was in jail. It was during those difficult times in Ananda Marga when maximum support was needed that Dada Samanvayanandji left and created his own organization to compete against Ananda Marga. The need of the hour was to stand firmly by Guru and raise the flag of Ananda Marga. Those days, so many margiis and acaryas withstood the onslaught and backlash of the negative forces, i.e. Mrs Indhira Gandhi's exploitative machine. Margiis and wts were forced into hiding, imprisoned, tortured, and humiliated. All the while Guru was in jail. No true Ananda Margii could ever think to leave in such a moment - never.

Yet, in that critical moment, when Baba was in jail and workers margiis were also suffering, Dada Samanvayanandji left to enjoy his own self-created guru-ship, and establish his own separate organization: Prema Marga. So while dedicated Ananda Margiis stood by Guru, Dada Samanvayanandji fled to establish his own so-called glory. This is not the quality of a disciple, but rather a case of betrayal. Or what should we call it.

Meanwhile Baba was in jail and everyone was struggling hard to carry on. This went on for years.

EMERGENCY OVER BUT DADA KEEPS AWAY FROM ANANDA MARGA

Finally, in 1977, Mrs Indhira Gandhi's regime was ousted, the Emergency was lifted, and all were released from jail. The authorities released everyone except Baba. From His cell, Baba issued a grand pardon to all. Baba was welcoming all back into Ananda Marga, regardless of what they had done. During Emergency, some had gone to their laokik homes, some were defectors, some testified against Baba in court, some had left their sadhana, others had turned to tamasik eating habits etc. People had gone astray for all kinds of reasons. And in 1977, Baba graciously pardoned all and welcomed everyone back, regardless of their story. And indeed, so many returned back into Ananda Marga.

But not Dada Samanvayananda / Shivananda. He was living the good life as a self-proclaimed guru, and he did not want to give that up. There was another thought in his mind as well. He was thinking that at any moment Ananda Marga could again fall into tough times. Because Baba was not going to change His teachings and those ideals are too tough for the authorities to accept. So again there will be trouble. Dadaji thought, "Better I should stay in my own guruship at my ashram."

In this calculated manner, Dadaji did not return to Ananda Marga in 1977 when Baba graciously pardoned and welcomed everyone. Nor, did Dada Samanavayananda return when Baba Himself was released from jail in August 1978. Weeks turned into months, and months turned into years.

Ananda Marga was growing by leaps and bounds. Baba performed the grandest dharma samiiksa in the history of humanity. Ananda Marga was fast spreading all around the globe. The organization was growing in size exponentially. Still Dada Samanvayananda was nowhere to be seen. Dadaji was still leading the life as "guru" in his ashram. Time and again, Dadaji's friends like Aksarananda had pleaded with him to return, but to no avail.

BABA REFUSED TO SEE SAMANVAYANANDJI

It was not until around 1984 or so, that Dada Samanvayananda showed up. He came to see Baba in Lake Gardens. Baba refused to see him and refused to let him inside the compound. So Dadaji stood outside the gate and waited. Days passed. Dadaji grew frustrated and despondent. He was standing outside the gate in his civil dress. He was thinking,  "Why should I stand here - I can put on my sannyasi dress and return to my own ashram in Dehradun."

Again his friends like Aksarananda came to his rescue. They pleaded with him to be patient and wait for Baba's approval. An entire month passed, Baba refused to see him or look at him. Still Dadaji was thinking to go back to his old ashram in Dehradun, and he never considered donating his ashram to Ananda Marga. Instead he kept that as his "safety-net" in case he ever wished to return there.

Then one day, Baba gave the order that Dada should be accepted back and he was given the name Ac Sambunath Brc. And he was given the very simple and basic post of ZO, i.e. zonal organizer within SDM. Later on he became CO, or circle organizer. Even then, Baba barred him from attending all kinds of meetings and reportings.

All in all, Dadaji was away from Ananda Marga for 11 years. When he was needed most to help in difficult times, he was entirely absent - just enjoying the high life as a self-appointed guru.

Even worse, after that time, Dada Samanvayanandji never expressed repentance or remorse for what happened in those days.

JUST SELF-GLORICATIONS, NO REMORSE

Rather, after his return to AMPS and was named Samanvayanandji, then he used to talk about how great Shivanandji was and how he (Shivanandji) used to have so many siddhis and do long sadhana. With that unrepentent ego, he would talk about himself in the third person as a means of praising himself up to the sky. Dadaji marched around with an extreme sense of entitlement - and not an ounce of repentance.

Plus, Dada Samanvayanandji shamelessly glorified his days in Dehradun in his book. He never once admitted that he betrayed Baba or that what he did was wrong. Dada was never open and honest with himself or others about this. Rather he tried to present this as his own greatness. 

He wrote his own book 'Glories of ...'.  And in that book he mentioned many times about his great work in Dehradun. So that time when Sadguru Baba was facing so many injustices in jail and all workers and family margiis were struggling tooth and nail to survive, Dadaji went against Guru and made his own separate organization known as Prema Marg. Not only did he leave Ananda Marga, but he created a parallel ashram that was directly challenging Baba's organisation and the path of Ananda Marga.

Yet about all this Dadaji says that this was his "great" work. In his book Dada Samanvayanandji writes on page 57:

"I had established an ashram at the foot of the Himalayas...in Dehradun District of UP."

Indeed, Dada Samanvayanandji did not have an ounce of repentance for his betrayal to Baba. He does not write, "Unfortunately blinded by my own ego I left Ananda Marga in that critical hour." Nor does he write, "How can I ever forgive myself for leaving Baba when so many inimical forces attacked Him." In his book, Dadaji does not express an iota of repentance etc. Just he basks in his own so-called glory that he built up his own ashram.

And even after publishing his book he did not express any remorse. Not a word of repentance did he express for those black days in which he left Baba and created his own organization.

In simple language this is betrayal to Baba and back-stabbing to Guru.

We should not hold Dadaji's example in some divine manner and others should not emulate Dadaji's approach. Now when groupism is rattling our organisation, this is not the time to depart and plant one's flag of glory elsewhere.

Namaskar,
Kalyan


NOTE: The section below demarcated by asterisks is an entirely different topic, completely unrelated to the above letter. It stands on its own as a point of interest.

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Purpose of Marriage

Baba says, "'Be like Shiva and Parvati, go on doing your worldly duties along with your psychic and spiritual pursuits, be the assets of the entire civilisation, and by your service the whole society should be benefited."

Note: This is the blessing Baba would graciously bestow on newly married couples when they approached the dais. The inner spirit of Baba's blessing is that in Ananda Marga marriage is not for carnal pleasures and sensual satisfaction. Rather it entails a serious commitment that has a deep significance. The marriage system in Ananda Marga is for building up one human society worthy of its name.

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