== HOW HARMFUL IT IS ==
Note: This entire letter is based on a new audio file - "Baba's Warning
About Infusing Fear in Children - uploaded to our blog. In that clip,
Baba is speaking in Bengali and the entire transcription and translation
is noted below at the bottom of this letter.
Here is where you can listen to the audio file:
http://www.am-global-01.blogspot.com/
Namaskar,
Often it is the case that parents and caretakers have no idea that what
they tell their child can be totally debilitating to the child's growth.
The child's entire development can be extremely adversely affected &
ruined by a few, seemingly harmless, words. If those parents knew, they
would certainly never do that again. Indeed they would never do that to
anyone - ever, what to say about their own child.
Any loving parent or sincere guardian who comes to know Baba's teaching
will repent the rest of their life for how they permanently ruined their
child's personality.
That is Baba's warning in this below passage: Parents and guardians
beware - do not inject fear into the mind of your child.
In contrast to the parents, elder siblings and older kids often get a
weird type of enjoyment by intentionally scaring younger children.
Whereas parents are not aware how harmful it is so they overlook the
matter and that perpetuates the problem.
Time and again people inject fear as it seems to be an easy way to
control the child, but the effect is most disastrous. For instance, a
parent might say, "If you do not sit still then a big monster will come
and eat you." With that fear, the child sits motionless and the parent
thinks that it was a good behaviour modification tactic.
In reality however, the whole psyche of small baby is crippled and that
problem only increases over time and manifests in various ways.
Unfortunately this technique and practice of injecting fear to resolve
an issue is a prevailing approach across the planet. That is why a major
portion of the population is affected and suffers from fear, shyness and
all kinds of problems in their day to day life.
Some people may not readily recognise this fact, but if you research
carefully you will find that the fear of ghosts, goblins and monsters
does not fade away. When they become adults that fear takes expression
in all kinds of ways: People feel intimidated in front of their boss,
frightened in dark, terrified in an isolated place, afraid to start new
work, and petrified in front of the police. That fear reflects in
multiple directions.
It is quite complex and dramatic how it takes place - tragically it
mushrooms in all kinds of ways.
Even worse is that this goes on from one generation to the next - what
horrors those children experience, as adults they pass that on to their
own children. In this way the problem gets replicated. We must break
this cycle.
If you are one of those who injected fear unknowingly and ruined a
child's psyche then try to undo that by giving them confidence. In that
way it may fade away.
For all these reasons and more, Baba has given this below teaching.
Listen carefully and practice.
Note: The below transcription from Baba's original spoken Bengali into
roman font may lack certain finer grammar points, but the overall idea
of the passage has been maintained. Those with greater linguistic
backgrounds are welcome to offer a more precise translation etc.
TRANSCRIPTION AND TRANSLATION
Listen to the audio file at, http://www.am-global-01.blogspot.com/
BABA SPOKE:
Ghrna', shaunka', bhaya, aet'a' holo pa'pa, jab tumi jakhan chotto
chile, tumi ka'uke ghrna' korte na'. Oi pare toma'r prativeshiira'
bandhura' ba'r'iir lokera', toma'ke shikhiye chilo ki, "Aeta korte
na'in, aeta ghrnya jinish." To, toma’ke bhaya shikhiye che, lajja'
shikhiye che, a'r seit'a shes'a paryanta toma'r rauna [lege] geche.
Choto chele du'dha kha'cche na'. Ba'r'iir lokera' bolle, "Oi juju a'che,
ta'la ga'che juju a'che, dhare nebe." Tumi jujur bhaye khiye nile
du'dha. Ta'r pare, sei tumi jakhane du vatsa'rer na'iny, tumi hoye gele
ba'isa vatsa'rer, takhano sei maner jujuta' roye gelo. Kakhano-kakhano
svapnetei juju ke dekhbe. Ekla' hote giye jujur bhaya buka kenpe ut'abe.
Era holo ki? Na, ca'inpiye deoya ba'ndha'na. Ai, this type of bondage or
these bondages are known as pa'shas.
TRANSLATION:
Hatred, doubt, fear are sin. When you were small, you did not hate
anybody. After that your neighbors, friends and family members taught
you, "This is what hate is, don't do such a thing." They taught you
fear, they taught you shyness, and in the end those interactions stained
your mind in that color. The small babe did not want to drink the milk.
So in order to get the baby to drink the milk, the family members said,
"Look a ghost is on the palm tree - it will come and get you if you do
not drink your milk." So you drank the milk out of fear of being caught
by the ghost. After many years, when you were no longer two, but became
twenty-two years of age, that mental ghost still existed in your mind.
From time to time in your dreams you will still see that ghost. In
consequence, while remaining in a lonely place your heart will become
startled and frozen due to fear of that ghost. What is this? Imposed
bondage. This type of bondage or these bondages are known as pa'shas.
BABA'S BLESSING
Baba says, "You will have to build a society in which no one is forced
to weep, where everyone smiles joyfully all the time and gets ample
scope for laughter. Seeing such mirth and merriment, Parama Purus'a will
feel immensely pleased. By giving joy to Parama Purus'a you will feel
even more joyful and will feel His close proximity. This is the actual
social code. And the actual spiritual code is the one that helps humans
move towards Parama Purus'a. Under no circumstances should one create
unnecessary controversies. The social code aims at bringing a broad
smile to the faces of the progeny of Parama Purus'a. You should all move
along this path – you are sure to meet with success." (AV-4)
Namaskar,
Amriteshwar
Note 1: READ THIS ALSO
Here is another posting on this topic of children and fear:
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Only Remedy
Baba says, "It is the duty of all human beings and especially those who
are devotees, it is their mandatory duty to always think that, 'I am a
machine and the controller is Parama Purusa. He is the machine man and I
have to work according to His desire. I have to fulfill His desire. This
body of mine is a machine and it belongs to Him. This is His machine and
this machine has to do His work.' If one constantly thinks in this way
then the vanity of action will never sprout. This is the only path to
save oneself from vanity. One has to think 'I am just one machine; I am
a tool and according to His desire I have to work'." (SS-16 (H), p. 81,
DMC Agra 19 Feb 84)
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