Date: Mon, 12 Dec 2011 22:47:23
To: AM-GLOBAL
Subject: Do Not Destroy the Psyche of Your Child
From: "Ishvara"
Baba
Namaskar,
Every parent wishes to raise a healthy, vibrant child who grows up to be physically able, mentally sharp, and spiritually awakened.
Yet, in nearly each and every land, community, and even family, concerned parents and / or social norms undermine the right and proper growth of the child.
Our mind is our greatest treasure - and the child's mind is so tender and impressionable - yet commonly a child's mind is stricken by fears needlessly, which hamper their growth and development. Such undue fears ruin the psychic peace of the child, today and far into the future.
As parents, as well-wishers of society, as educators, and as sadhakas, we should all be critically aware of this issue.
In the US and parts of Europe, the holiday of Halloween was recently celebrated. Kids dress up in scary costumes, participate in haunted houses, hear ghost stories, and so much more happens. The underlying element is fear.
Plus today's filmmakers and authors play off a similar sentiment: excitement through fear. There is an entire corporate business model centered around this. All geared toward instilling the thrill of fear into the mind - in order to turn a profit.
There are so many ways that the entertainment industry and social festivals introduce the fear factor into a child's mind: ghosts, serial killers, scary creatures from outer space, spooky noises, and so much more. People even get a sort of sadistic happiness from scaring young kids. Fear gets imposed in so many ways.
As adults we may say, "What's the big deal, they're just kids, they're having fun, let them be, they'll grow up and understand the truth."
But it is not like that. The human psyche and mind are very fragile. In so many discourses Baba points out that the child's mind will be riddled and encumbered by those unfounded fears for their entire life.
Because the child thinks those monsters, ghosts, and goblins are real. For them it is not something imaginary or temporary. Children do not employ a rational mind-set to remove those fears. Those fears - based on imposed false ideas - remain with them for ages and ages. That is Baba's distinct warning.
Thus we should think a thousand times before exposing our children to horror films, ghost stories, and even seemingly innocuous, kid-centered festivals like Halloween. All these things are bound to burden, or even ruin, a child's psyche.
Even then, the problem stems deeper than this. It is not just the entertainment business and common social festivals that are at fault.
In His Ananda Vacanamrtam series, Baba discusses and points out specific examples where families and caretakers use a fear complex as a means to control or discipline children.
For instance, if the kids are playing and making too much noise when it is their bed time, then a parent or caretaker may say, "If you do not go to sleep this instant, then monsters will come and attack you."
Or they may say, "Naughty children are bound to get eaten by goblins."
Some even exclaim, "If you do not behave, Satan will punish you forever."
Baba also cites the examples how grandmothers tell disobedient children that, "Ghosts will come and strangle you if you do not sit still."
In His Jan 1 1986 discourse in Kolkata, "Existential Flow & Its Culminating Point", Baba reveals how fear is often an imposed bondage by one's own family members. If a baby is not eating its meal, then the grandmother tries to put fear in that child's mind. The grandma terrorizes the baby by saying, "If you do not eat then a ghost will come and swallow you. So sit down and eat and do not runaround." Then when that child grows to 22yrs of age, he still has nightmares about a goblin coming and sitting on his chest. Baba explains this clearly in His discourse, but unfortunately this section was neither transcribed in the Bangla edition nor translated into English. It was missed entirely. And again this further shows how one's own family members impose life-long fear complexes by their threats etc.
To some or more degree such imposed fear complexes are used in countless families around the world. It is a cheap, misguided parenting technique that happens nearly pervasively. We may all even think back to our own childhoods and remember hearing such things.
The parent or caregiver naively thinks that the problem is solved. They think that the child has started to behave properly or that the child stopped making noise. So the parent thinks that the fear technique is a veritable method for discipling a child.
In the short term it may look like that.
But the overarching long-term effects are disastrous. There is a breach of trust and even more than that the child's mind is permanently scarred by that fear. It cannot be removed easily. That fear sits in their mind for ages and may even carry over into their next life. That is the depth to which the imposed fear invades their psyche.
So such unfounded fears that get imposed on a child's mind become psychic baggage for the long haul. And we will discuss more about this below.
Here is one other key point to the discussion.
Bhaya, or fear, is one of the four basic propensities of each and every human being. This sense of fear is actually a survival instinct. Animals have it; humans have it. So we already have a sense of fear built into our human personality.
But that innate sense of fear is based on reality. Animals are fearful of their predators so they run away from safety. The fear is real and that fear preserves their existence.
Humans also have real fears. "I am too scared to jump off of this bridge"; "I am scared and do not want to grab the snake; "I am too scared to walk into the fire; "I am scared about death."
Here the point is that the fundamental fear vrtti is already part of our mental constitution - it is a base instinct, not something noble or divine.
So then to impose false fears on the human psyche is just burdening us further. It multiplies that sense of fear which already haunts the human personality. Because already we are fearful about real events, and then as children we become frightened by so many false or imaginary things as well.
It just multiplies the sense of fear and that is not good.
The accumulation of fears debilitates the human mind - not just in our youth but lifelong. Baba tells us that fear - caused by family, social and religious dogmas - will stick with a person for life.
A person may suffer from a lack of courage and become permanently afraid of the dark. Or a person may not even like to remain in the house alone even as an adult.
And not only that, but a person may be even lack the necessary courage to confidently answer questions in a job interview. Before the interview they may even be hiding in the bathroom - too scared to walk inside. This is not just a question of normal nervousness, but rather a deep seated fear that shakes their bones.
Thus the fears that get imposed on a child's psyche are baggage they carry for life - in all sorts of shape and sizes, in all kinds of ways. They will be permanently shackled and will never grow properly. So we should be a thousand times careful never to impose such fears on a child.
Here Baba scientifically shows how the fear complex takes root in the human mind and becomes part of a person's living reality.
Baba says, "Suppose in daytime you are in a lonely place. It may or may not be a lonely place. Suppose in daytime you are alone in a big house, and some people told you that there is a ghost – “Ghost… ghost… ghost.” You heard it. The acoustic wave touched your mind, touched the subconscious portion of your mind, and after that you are told, “You know, Mr. X, there is a ghost in this house.” And you are Mr. X. “There is a ghost in this house.” All the nerve fibres fail to function. What will happen then? Just touch the conscious level of your mind, and as an extro-objective creation, as an external reflection of your very ectoplasmic stuff, you will see a ghost. And what sort of ghost will you see? The description of a ghost that you read in your books or you heard from your granny, “A ghost is like this.” In broad daylight you will see the ghost." (AV-12)
Thus what to speak of even small children, an adult's mind can also be polluted by fear such that those false and imagined fears come to life for them.
Here below Baba further explains the nature of this phenomenon.
Baba says, "You are the witnessing entity, you are the seer of the ghost, and a certain compartment of your mind went outside as an external projection and took the form of the ghost, that is, the very structure of the ghost is ectoplasmic in nature and that ectoplasm came from your source. You are the creator of that ghost. Actually there is no ghost. But you will see many a respectable man who will say, “Yes, I have seen it! Yes, I have seen it!” He is not incorrect in saying this. He saw it, but the ghost was of his creation. It was an outer or external objective reflection, or external objective projection, or external positive hallucination." (AV-12)
So the human mind is very fragile and subject to all kinds of fears - even false ones that we hear in the form of ghost stories, etc.
No one should take this point lightly and think that scaring children is just one momentary incident. Any and all fear has a huge impact on their psyche. They can become crippled for life. We should all pay heed. That is Baba's warning.
By Baba's grace He has given us - at minimum - two pathways for creating a fearless mindset.
1) We must not pollute the minds of children by imposing fear sentiments.
Baba says, "It is important that these lullabys should convey the inspiration for the development of heroism and knowledge, but there should be no frightening ideas in them." (PNS-10)
Thus our stories, films, festivals, disciplinary tactics, tales, holidays should be totally devoid of scary thoughts and images. Children should feel safe, secure, and loved - never burdened by any imposed or false fear.
That is the first method for raising a healthy child.
2) The second method is to read Baba's short stories wherein He has graciously written various ghost stories where those ghosts are friendly and helpful. Sometimes the ghost sweetly drapes a mosquito net over a sleeping person so that they will be more comfortable. Or the ghost will bring a glass of water or offer shelter to a needy person. Basically, in so many of His stories, ghosts and other creatures are quite friendly and philanthropic. This helps create a positive mind-set wherein one will not fall prey to dogmatic fears about ghosts.
Today's filmmakers and story writers should also follow this path.
This is a second method for raising children free of fear complexes.
By Baba's grace, we should be 100% wary of introducing false fears into the mind-set of our children. Thus we must re-evaluate occasions like Halloween and and be cent per cent certain that our children are never exposed to fear tactics as as form of discipline. With the gift of a safe and happy childhood, that young one will grow up and live a courageous and dharmic life.
Baba says, "So one must move along the path of satya and one must have the satya as one’s only desideratum. And this is the only path, this is the path of fearlessness; that is, there is no fear in it, nothing to be afraid of." (AV-2)
Namaskar,
Ishvara
To: AM-GLOBAL
Subject: Do Not Destroy the Psyche of Your Child
From: "Ishvara"
Baba
== DO NOT DESTROY THE PSYCHE OF YOUR CHILD ==
Namaskar,
Every parent wishes to raise a healthy, vibrant child who grows up to be physically able, mentally sharp, and spiritually awakened.
Yet, in nearly each and every land, community, and even family, concerned parents and / or social norms undermine the right and proper growth of the child.
Our mind is our greatest treasure - and the child's mind is so tender and impressionable - yet commonly a child's mind is stricken by fears needlessly, which hamper their growth and development. Such undue fears ruin the psychic peace of the child, today and far into the future.
As parents, as well-wishers of society, as educators, and as sadhakas, we should all be critically aware of this issue.
FESTIVALS, FEAR, HALLOWEEN & SO MUCH MORE
In the US and parts of Europe, the holiday of Halloween was recently celebrated. Kids dress up in scary costumes, participate in haunted houses, hear ghost stories, and so much more happens. The underlying element is fear.
Plus today's filmmakers and authors play off a similar sentiment: excitement through fear. There is an entire corporate business model centered around this. All geared toward instilling the thrill of fear into the mind - in order to turn a profit.
There are so many ways that the entertainment industry and social festivals introduce the fear factor into a child's mind: ghosts, serial killers, scary creatures from outer space, spooky noises, and so much more. People even get a sort of sadistic happiness from scaring young kids. Fear gets imposed in so many ways.
As adults we may say, "What's the big deal, they're just kids, they're having fun, let them be, they'll grow up and understand the truth."
But it is not like that. The human psyche and mind are very fragile. In so many discourses Baba points out that the child's mind will be riddled and encumbered by those unfounded fears for their entire life.
Because the child thinks those monsters, ghosts, and goblins are real. For them it is not something imaginary or temporary. Children do not employ a rational mind-set to remove those fears. Those fears - based on imposed false ideas - remain with them for ages and ages. That is Baba's distinct warning.
Thus we should think a thousand times before exposing our children to horror films, ghost stories, and even seemingly innocuous, kid-centered festivals like Halloween. All these things are bound to burden, or even ruin, a child's psyche.
ORDINARY FAMILIES IMPOSE
SCARE TACTICS AS DISCIPLINE
SCARE TACTICS AS DISCIPLINE
Even then, the problem stems deeper than this. It is not just the entertainment business and common social festivals that are at fault.
In His Ananda Vacanamrtam series, Baba discusses and points out specific examples where families and caretakers use a fear complex as a means to control or discipline children.
For instance, if the kids are playing and making too much noise when it is their bed time, then a parent or caretaker may say, "If you do not go to sleep this instant, then monsters will come and attack you."
Or they may say, "Naughty children are bound to get eaten by goblins."
Some even exclaim, "If you do not behave, Satan will punish you forever."
Baba also cites the examples how grandmothers tell disobedient children that, "Ghosts will come and strangle you if you do not sit still."
In His Jan 1 1986 discourse in Kolkata, "Existential Flow & Its Culminating Point", Baba reveals how fear is often an imposed bondage by one's own family members. If a baby is not eating its meal, then the grandmother tries to put fear in that child's mind. The grandma terrorizes the baby by saying, "If you do not eat then a ghost will come and swallow you. So sit down and eat and do not runaround." Then when that child grows to 22yrs of age, he still has nightmares about a goblin coming and sitting on his chest. Baba explains this clearly in His discourse, but unfortunately this section was neither transcribed in the Bangla edition nor translated into English. It was missed entirely. And again this further shows how one's own family members impose life-long fear complexes by their threats etc.
To some or more degree such imposed fear complexes are used in countless families around the world. It is a cheap, misguided parenting technique that happens nearly pervasively. We may all even think back to our own childhoods and remember hearing such things.
The parent or caregiver naively thinks that the problem is solved. They think that the child has started to behave properly or that the child stopped making noise. So the parent thinks that the fear technique is a veritable method for discipling a child.
In the short term it may look like that.
But the overarching long-term effects are disastrous. There is a breach of trust and even more than that the child's mind is permanently scarred by that fear. It cannot be removed easily. That fear sits in their mind for ages and may even carry over into their next life. That is the depth to which the imposed fear invades their psyche.
So such unfounded fears that get imposed on a child's mind become psychic baggage for the long haul. And we will discuss more about this below.
MULTIPLIES ONE'S FEARS
Here is one other key point to the discussion.
Bhaya, or fear, is one of the four basic propensities of each and every human being. This sense of fear is actually a survival instinct. Animals have it; humans have it. So we already have a sense of fear built into our human personality.
But that innate sense of fear is based on reality. Animals are fearful of their predators so they run away from safety. The fear is real and that fear preserves their existence.
Humans also have real fears. "I am too scared to jump off of this bridge"; "I am scared and do not want to grab the snake; "I am too scared to walk into the fire; "I am scared about death."
Here the point is that the fundamental fear vrtti is already part of our mental constitution - it is a base instinct, not something noble or divine.
So then to impose false fears on the human psyche is just burdening us further. It multiplies that sense of fear which already haunts the human personality. Because already we are fearful about real events, and then as children we become frightened by so many false or imaginary things as well.
It just multiplies the sense of fear and that is not good.
LIFELONG PROBLEMS
The accumulation of fears debilitates the human mind - not just in our youth but lifelong. Baba tells us that fear - caused by family, social and religious dogmas - will stick with a person for life.
A person may suffer from a lack of courage and become permanently afraid of the dark. Or a person may not even like to remain in the house alone even as an adult.
And not only that, but a person may be even lack the necessary courage to confidently answer questions in a job interview. Before the interview they may even be hiding in the bathroom - too scared to walk inside. This is not just a question of normal nervousness, but rather a deep seated fear that shakes their bones.
Thus the fears that get imposed on a child's psyche are baggage they carry for life - in all sorts of shape and sizes, in all kinds of ways. They will be permanently shackled and will never grow properly. So we should be a thousand times careful never to impose such fears on a child.
BABA SAYS:
YOU WILL SEE A GHOST
YOU WILL SEE A GHOST
Here Baba scientifically shows how the fear complex takes root in the human mind and becomes part of a person's living reality.
Baba says, "Suppose in daytime you are in a lonely place. It may or may not be a lonely place. Suppose in daytime you are alone in a big house, and some people told you that there is a ghost – “Ghost… ghost… ghost.” You heard it. The acoustic wave touched your mind, touched the subconscious portion of your mind, and after that you are told, “You know, Mr. X, there is a ghost in this house.” And you are Mr. X. “There is a ghost in this house.” All the nerve fibres fail to function. What will happen then? Just touch the conscious level of your mind, and as an extro-objective creation, as an external reflection of your very ectoplasmic stuff, you will see a ghost. And what sort of ghost will you see? The description of a ghost that you read in your books or you heard from your granny, “A ghost is like this.” In broad daylight you will see the ghost." (AV-12)
Thus what to speak of even small children, an adult's mind can also be polluted by fear such that those false and imagined fears come to life for them.
Here below Baba further explains the nature of this phenomenon.
Baba says, "You are the witnessing entity, you are the seer of the ghost, and a certain compartment of your mind went outside as an external projection and took the form of the ghost, that is, the very structure of the ghost is ectoplasmic in nature and that ectoplasm came from your source. You are the creator of that ghost. Actually there is no ghost. But you will see many a respectable man who will say, “Yes, I have seen it! Yes, I have seen it!” He is not incorrect in saying this. He saw it, but the ghost was of his creation. It was an outer or external objective reflection, or external objective projection, or external positive hallucination." (AV-12)
So the human mind is very fragile and subject to all kinds of fears - even false ones that we hear in the form of ghost stories, etc.
No one should take this point lightly and think that scaring children is just one momentary incident. Any and all fear has a huge impact on their psyche. They can become crippled for life. We should all pay heed. That is Baba's warning.
SOLUTION:
CREATING A FEARLESS MIND
CREATING A FEARLESS MIND
By Baba's grace He has given us - at minimum - two pathways for creating a fearless mindset.
1) We must not pollute the minds of children by imposing fear sentiments.
Baba says, "It is important that these lullabys should convey the inspiration for the development of heroism and knowledge, but there should be no frightening ideas in them." (PNS-10)
Thus our stories, films, festivals, disciplinary tactics, tales, holidays should be totally devoid of scary thoughts and images. Children should feel safe, secure, and loved - never burdened by any imposed or false fear.
That is the first method for raising a healthy child.
2) The second method is to read Baba's short stories wherein He has graciously written various ghost stories where those ghosts are friendly and helpful. Sometimes the ghost sweetly drapes a mosquito net over a sleeping person so that they will be more comfortable. Or the ghost will bring a glass of water or offer shelter to a needy person. Basically, in so many of His stories, ghosts and other creatures are quite friendly and philanthropic. This helps create a positive mind-set wherein one will not fall prey to dogmatic fears about ghosts.
Today's filmmakers and story writers should also follow this path.
This is a second method for raising children free of fear complexes.
BABA'S BLESSING
By Baba's grace, we should be 100% wary of introducing false fears into the mind-set of our children. Thus we must re-evaluate occasions like Halloween and and be cent per cent certain that our children are never exposed to fear tactics as as form of discipline. With the gift of a safe and happy childhood, that young one will grow up and live a courageous and dharmic life.
Baba says, "So one must move along the path of satya and one must have the satya as one’s only desideratum. And this is the only path, this is the path of fearlessness; that is, there is no fear in it, nothing to be afraid of." (AV-2)
Namaskar,
Ishvara
********************************************
Food Affects Protoplasmic Cells
Baba says, "Whatever I get, that I will eat" - this must not be the policy of a sane being. This human body is a composite of protoplasmic cells, and these protoplasmic cells are made of the food we take in. If the food and drink is defective, then the protoplasmic cells will also become defective, and the human mind, which is the collective mind of so many protoplasmic minds, will also become defective. That is why ta'masik or static food has a negative influence on the human mind." (SS-18 p.3)
********************************************
Food Affects Protoplasmic Cells
Baba says, "Whatever I get, that I will eat" - this must not be the policy of a sane being. This human body is a composite of protoplasmic cells, and these protoplasmic cells are made of the food we take in. If the food and drink is defective, then the protoplasmic cells will also become defective, and the human mind, which is the collective mind of so many protoplasmic minds, will also become defective. That is why ta'masik or static food has a negative influence on the human mind." (SS-18 p.3)
********************************************
No comments:
Post a Comment
Comment here